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In 2004, Father Fred Daley was one of four openly gay priests in the country.

“The more I became comfortable with myself, the more I felt that my experience as a gay priest is priceless to share with other people who are struggling,” said Daley, the pastor of the All Saints Church in Syracuse.

Daley and SU senior Tara Sandlin shared their experiences with both queerness and religion at the “Queer Faith” event Tuesday. The event, co-hosted by Hendricks Chapel and the LGBTQ Resource Center, was a belated celebration of National Coming Out Day.

Born into a Roman Catholic family, Daley said he was always interested in the priesthood. He said he was able to keep his sexual identity “on ice” as he was going through the process of becoming ordained.

“I loved working with people and learning from them, but I noticed a deep ache within me,” Daley said. “An ache that became deeper and deeper…I had to start facing who I was.”

Through some deep self-reflection, Daley began to question the church’s practices. He felt guilty and confused, and didn’t know how to grapple with his newfound feelings.

“I had to stop at a church and find a priest and go to confession so that all this stuff could be wiped away,” he said.

Daley spent eight years coming to terms with his sexuality. He began to heal and connect with his identity by going to therapy and talking with other priests.

He then returned to the source of his faith — the Bible. He reviewed the scriptures and unraveled the theology as he looked for answers about his own sexuality. When he found that there were no concrete ideas about sexual identity in the scripture, he felt comforted and like he could finally be himself.

“The stuff in the Bible has nothing to do with sexuality and sexual orientation,” Daley said. “It was such a grace to be able to accept who I was. My ministry was peaceful.”

Local ministries later awarded Daley the “Great Hero Award” for his courage to be honest with himself and others, which created an open conversation in the church.

“The institutional church has a lot of work to do. Like all institutions, little by little brings change,” Daley said. “We have to find our voice and speak.”

Sandlin, who identifies as queer ad is a Youth and Children’s coordinator at Plymouth Congregational Church in downtown Syracuse, also faced difficulties with the intersection of queerness and religion.

Sandlin grew up in a Christian family. When they discovered they were queer, Sandlin felt that their identity needed to stay a secret because they didn’t think they’d be accepted in their religious community.

Worrying about their safety in a religious space while coming to terms with their own identity and autonomy was overwhelming for Sandlin. But ultimately, they decided to stay true to themself and come out. Later on, sharing their identity with the community inspired a few of their queer friends to come out too.

“I made a choice to come out — even though I knew I was going to be kicked out — because I wanted it to be made clear what (my) belief was,” Sandlin said.

Elliott Hickey, the LBGTQ Resource Center’s program coordinator, said the university should actively work to create a safe space on campus for all those who identify as queer.

“I believe as long as (SU continues) to show intentionality and intentional allyship, they will be sending the right message to the students,” they said.

Navigating queerness and religion may be difficult, but it’s a worthwhile pursuit, Sandlin said.

“Sometimes we choose to (come out and confront homophobia) knowing we’re going to get hurt,” Sandlin said. “But it’s for a larger purpose of resistance in trying to shed light on things to hopefully make the world a better place.”

Published on October 26, 2022 at 1:15 am